SHOCKING END: An assassin attempts to sneak up on Bond in the movie Goldfinger, but he spots the assailant approaching him from behind, reflected in the eyes of a beautiful girl. A fight ensues and continues into the bathroom where Bond throws the at
tacker into a bath full of water. While he scrabbles for Bond's gun, 007 tips an electric lamp into the bath which electrocutes the henchman. This comes top for inspiring the class Bond line as he looks in the bath afterwards: "Shocking... positively shocking."
GOLDEN DEMISE: For inventiveness, it has to be the suffocation of Jill Masterton by covering her entire body in gold paint. Auric Goldfinger takes his revenge on his lover and sends a chilling warning signal to Bond after 007 ruins his scam cheating at cards. Key to the death is not leaving a small unpainted area of skin at the base of the spine to allow the skin to breathe; leading to the long-lasting – and entirely erroneous – belief that this really could kill you!
NO QUARREL: Quarrel, Bond's sidekick in Dr No, is burned to death by a fake dragon. It is actually an armoured vehicle with flamethrowers attached which the Doctor uses to deter locals from visiting his island, a place for harvesting guano, but really the site of an audacious plan for world domination. The death of the Cayman Islands fishermen comes high for utter gruesomeness and the accompanying horrendous wail. Handily it gets the sidekick out of the way, so Bond can concentrate on rescuing, and seducing, the ravishing Ursula Andress.
BLUNT INSTRUMENT: Bond's first kill in Casino Royale must be listed for being at the very start of a succession of ruthless kills. The un-named stooge of an MI6 informant is killed by James, who of course will not become 007 until he kills the turn-coat himself, in a graphic monochrome opening scene. Set in a public bathroom, the flunky is dispatched with utter violence and eventually drowned in a toilet sink, proving this "new" Bond is Fleming's "blunt instrument". High wince-factor for audiences.
SUCKER PUNCH: Auric Goldfinger's demise has to among the top deaths for its defiance of physics. A shot is fired in his private jet and a window is broken. Bond manages to get a grip and hangs on for dear life. His precious-metal-loving enemy is not so lucky and, after an amusing moment when he becomes wedged with legs dangling in mid-air outside the plane, he is sucked out to his death. This has to be one of the best for its sheer improbability – big man + small window > no chance.
The full article contains 449 words and appears in The Scotsman newspaper.
