Fordyce Maxwell

Fordyce Maxwell: 'We all know people we thought were normal until we met their dog' THERE are good and conscientious owners of dogs. I see some regularly with animals under control, on or off a lead. Then there are the other 95% whose dog can do no wrong as it digs up a friend's young vegetables, knocks over a toddler, burst

Fordyce Maxwell: 'You don't have to be a world traveller to make a difference' JAZZ, Johnny Cash and waves of laughter in a country church is not everyone's idea of an appropriate send-off. Even in a full-house congregation under last orders from the deceased to dress casually and have fun, a few sat upright and disapprovin

Fordyce Maxwell: 'Dances were more likely to see a beery punch-up than a joint-fuelled love-in' IT'S not so much traditional as compulsory to mark anniversaries ending with a zero – a first anniversary and ones ending with a five are only slightly less popular – so in the past few weeks the BBC has been giving a 1968 retrospective big lic

Fordyce Maxwell: 'All we can do is try to stay calm while removing dog excrement from shoes' RESEARCH has confirmed my fear that the prevailing mood in our great country today is baffled fury. Those who complain that this finding is suspect – because I posed the question "Is your prevailing mood baffled fury? Just say yes," and carr

Fordyce Maxwell: 'Were peasants who put their cash under the mattress right after all?'

Fordyce Maxwell: 'I see myself more as a masochist who tries to support his local team'

Fordyce Maxwell: 'Pets' headstones ranged from small and low to marble with winged angel'

Fordyce Maxwell: 'I know I'll enjoy it. Just don't call me granpaw. Or gramps. Or Methuselah'

Fordyce Maxwell - 'Islanders are probably outnumbered by second and holiday home owners'

Fordyce Maxwell: 'The jam was well set, the picky might even say solid, as we cut it out in chunks'

'I thought about Bobby Charlton and men like him during the recent storms'

By Fordyce Maxwell: 'Don't attach a roller and brush to one pole. No one likes a brush up their skirt'

Fordyce Maxwell: 'Shepherds who walked miles a day have been seduced by quad bikes'

'This year will be different as I heed the wisdom of Alan Titchmarsh'

'We thought that a good resolution would be to scrap the television'

'Small feathers got into strange places and a turkey left a scar for ever'

'It's scary how ingrained an image of Scotland that sodding deep-fried bar is'

'Given the chance any middle-aged tourists will behave like 10-year-olds' FRESH AIR

'Moving up one branch turned me from sawyer into a rescue mission' FRESH AIR

'Men know why stamping on someone's head is not only legal but approved' FORDYCE MAXWELL

'You can send your avatar to a meeting... but it is still wasting your time' FORDYCE MAXWELL

'French schoolboys ignore conkers. Small wonder they lost at the world cup' FORDYCE MAXWELL

ADVERTISMENT

Home Back to content Sitemap Contact Us

Also Search

Featured Advertising

Johnston Press Digital Publishing

Sister Newspapers:

This website and its associated newspaper adheres to the Press Complaints Commission’s Code of Practice. If you have a complaint about editorial content which relates to inaccuracy or intrusion, then contact the Editor by clicking here.

If you remain dissatisfied with the response provided then you can contact the PCC by clicking here.

Sections

Other Sections

Topics

Other Sites

Fordyce Maxwell

More Stories