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My boy said he'd run away if I send him to that school

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Published Date: 30 August 2008
A MOTHER has told how her seven-year-old son said he would rather "stand in front of a train" than go back to school after being beaten-up by bullies twice in one day.
Sarah Carr said she had been forced to remove her son Dylan from Prestonpans Primary, in East Lothian, in the wake of the attacks. She also today hit out at the way the school dealt with her complaints of bullying, as the police confirmed they were looking into the attacks.

Mrs Carr said that Dylan was pushed and kicked by two older boys in the playground before school on Tuesday.

However, the school insists Dylan did not tell any of the teachers about what had happened.

Later that day, on his way home from school, the youngster was assaulted again, this time by two older girls. Mrs Carr said her son was pushed to the ground, kicked and punched and ended up "covered in blood".

It followed an incident last week when he was pushed around in the playground by two boys, with no apparent motivation.

Housewife Mrs Carr said she left four messages on the school's answering machine after she found out about her son's attacks on Tuesday, and also spoke directly to the school secretary, asking for the headteacher to call her.

After getting no response, said Mrs Carr, she went to the school the following morning to tell the headteacher she was removing Dylan from the school.

Mrs Carr, who lives in the South Grange area of Prestonpans, said: "Dylan has been very upset.

"He told me he would rather stand in front of a train than go back to that school and he would run away if I made him go back.

"I've been so scared to let him out of my sight – I even sat on the end of his bed until he fell asleep. When I told him he had a place at St Gabriel's School, he jumped up and said, 'Mummy, thank you very much, you've saved my life'. Words can't describe how that makes me feel to hear him talk like that."

Dylan's case is one of hundreds reported in Lothians schools each year. Recent figures show that in Edinburgh alone, the number of reported bullying incidents in schools was 384 last year, while the number of reported racism incidents was 289.

Mrs Carr said it was a "weight off her shoulders" to have secured Dylan a place at another school.

She has also decided to remove her twin sons John and James, who are five, from Prestonpans Infant School into St Gabriel's. East Lothian Council, however, is satisfied with the way the situation was dealt with, and says the headteacher at Prestonpans Primary did try and return Mrs Carr's calls on Tuesday afternoon.

A spokeswoman said: "

We feel that the headteacher at Prestonpans Primary did everything she could to resolve the situation but wasn't given adequate time."

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  • Last Updated: 30 August 2008 11:30 AM
  • Source: Edinburgh Evening News
  • Location: Edinburgh
  • Related Topics: Bullying at school
 
1

alex paterson,

edinburgh 30/08/2008 12:24:22
Of course Dylan did not tell any teachers,he did not want beat up again after school,the school needs looking into.
2

A Friend of Fernando Poo,

30/08/2008 13:26:21
Send him to school with a cricket bat. Make it entirely clear to the police and school authorities that if threatened or attacked, he will use it to down his attackers. Faced with that kind of determination, they'll back down and tackle the problem.

If not, well, a bully in hospital is one less bully to worry about.
3

madrab,

edinburgh 30/08/2008 13:35:13
Are you two on drugs?

If the kid can't learn to stick up for himself he'll be bullied for the rest of his life.

Will he continue to call his mum every time?
4

A Friend of Fernando Poo,

30/08/2008 13:39:02
#3: Surely braining the proto-criminals with a cricket bat would be "sticking up for himself". The thugs have made it clear they understand the language of violence. A clout on the head with a cricket bat means "no" in such language.

Trust me it works: I applied that theory successfully at age nine.
5

tomias,

Edinburgh 30/08/2008 14:30:21
Is there a religious element in this story?
Sectarianism in the 'Pans- of never !
6

Mad Meg,

Lunatic Association of School Governers 30/08/2008 15:38:12
Pehaps the school should follow the anti-bullying methods that Gracemount school did a couple of years ago (when a friend's son was getting bullied in the playground) - lock him in the school classroom during the play period.
Yes it's detention for the victim, while the bullies laugh outside, but it a typical anti-bullying method which was used by Gracemount a couple of years ago.


7

Diana,

Edinburgh 30/08/2008 15:59:43
#3 - He's only 7, for heaven's sake!

The school may be able to do something about the bullying on school property, but unfortunately, the walk home would be a completely different matter.
8

A Friend of Fernando Poo,

30/08/2008 16:04:44
#6: Sadly, I'm sure it surprises none of us that some school officials are so half-witted as to imprison the victim rather than deal with the problem. Those are precisely the circumstances when direct action is mandated.

There are far too many idiots ready to blame the victim and "understand" the criminals.
9

A Friend of Fernando Poo,

30/08/2008 16:06:38
#7: Diana - so presumably are the proto-criminals. Don't you think it's better for the rest of society that they learn as early as possible that if they molest citizens, there will be consequences?

Better a trip to the hospital at 7 than jail at 21.
10

The Geniune Mario Antionette,

30/08/2008 16:12:25
It's a police matter
11

Jenny MacArthur's Humvee,

30/08/2008 16:18:18
Bullying in schools has gone on since the dawn of time, sadly teachers can't do anything about it now. I hear rumours new labour even want to make it illegal just to shout at children. I got racially abused all the way through school but I get the last laugh now when I see the bullies pushing the pushchairs of their unplanned kids while I have a very interesting and freedom filled life.
12

jambolove1969,

edinburgh 30/08/2008 17:37:44
My daughter was regularly bullied at the Royal High but providing names of the bullies to the school did nothing to stop it. The bullies even got her in the street after her school career ended & have been to court for the assault. I've always felt that I'm almost being encouraged to take vigilante action.
13

JT,

30/08/2008 18:01:02
When I was bullied at school over 20 years ago, I began to stand up to them and got in trouble, even though my parents fully supported me the school did nothing at all and at one point, I had to apologise to them after I smacked one across the nose. Due to the fact this was one of only two high schools in the area that I could go there was no choice but to continue to go to the school. Eventually I left school and still I hate that school. Having said that it made more determined to stand up against anyone who "bullied" me and I hope this little boy does the same. If he walks away he is a braver person than most. Good luck to him and his mum. As for the school shame on you for not supporting or at least speaking to the mum. #11 I experienced the same last laugh when I saw some years ago the ring leader being dragged down with 3 kids under the age of 7, looking haggered and living off benefits whilst I was out having a life kids free. Ha Ha!!!Servs you right. What goes around comes around.
14

A Friend of Fernando Poo,

30/08/2008 18:19:37
These stories don't surprise me. Schools are chock full of idiots who want to understand criminals and their spawn instead of punishing them. Sadly the police have also been infiltrated and are more likely to come after the citizen who strikes back than they are the criminals who prey on them.

That Tony Martin got jail instead of a medal tells us all we need to know.
15

zzzz,

30/08/2008 19:27:19
14

Tony Martin getting jailed was entirely the correct decision. I can support the need to attack a person if you yourself are being assaulted, however his actions when weighed up against the situation he faced were wholly disproportionate. The burglars were posing him no immediate threat, fleeing the house - does that entitle him to shoot them a point black range with an illegally held shotgun? In saying that, there is no faith in the court system to deal with them appropriately when caught, but this sort of precedent cannot be set when defending your own property, he wasn't even acting in defence.
16

UrbanFox,

30/08/2008 19:41:11
Its disgraceful. I feel very sorry for Sarah and Dylan, it must be so distressing. The problem is gutless teachers and PC local authorities. The bullies should be suspended and charged, if possible, by the police. These are the criminals of the future and end up unemployable because of their anti-social attitudes. I heard about the bullies from my Primary now as adults. In and out of prison. Sad losers in life.

#3 How can a solitary 7 year old boy stand up to several older bullies ?
17

Scotish Exile,

30/08/2008 21:05:36
The sooner he stands up for himself the better, his mother should take him to boxing lessons or a form of martial arts, so he can kick the sh*te out of the bully's the next time they try anything, instead of making him a national laughing stock
18

NC1,

30/08/2008 22:50:26
ITS NOT THE SCHOOLS FAULT, ITS THE UP BRINGING OF THE CHILDREN.
19

fmuldar,

New Jersey, USA 31/08/2008 02:44:38
Where is the Father of this Kid!!!
I would have been knocking on the door of the parents (especially the father) of these "PUNK" kids too show Him the "error" of His kids upbringing!! You take care of this situation like any other---I would "Dare" these "Punks" too do what they do while I was in The background--watching My kid--a "GOOD SP----NG" in public is what they need--keep the Police out of it--The Father (where ever He is) of this kid should take care of "Business"--"SUE" THE HELL OUT OF THE SCHOOL" as well.
20

,

31/08/2008 10:44:54
Comment Removed By Administrator
Reason:
21

A Friend of Fernando Poo,

31/08/2008 13:33:27
#16 wonders: "How can a solitary 7 year old boy stand up to several older bullies?"

With weaponry. It's perfectly reasonable for a kid to carry a cricket bat or tennis racquet. Ambush the bullies one by one and hospitalise them using sports equipment.

Once they recover, they'll remember that this kid is not to be crossed. With any luck, they'll successfully extrapolate the lesson, stop attacking anyone and that will save us paying taxes to jail them when they're adults.

Wehn the police and school authorities are too politicallyu correct to do anything but protect the criminals, direct action is a legitimate tool of pest control.
22

celtic4,

USA 31/08/2008 17:02:01
So switch the boy's school. My children were bullied, until they stood up for themselves. Then it ceased. Also, the school leader should have been told by the boy that this was going on. And no...it isn't the schools fault. (Beat up by girls???)
23

A Friend of Fernando Poo,

31/08/2008 18:22:23
#15: I agree that Tony Martin should have been charged with illegal shotgun possession. However he couldn't know what the intruders were there for and could reasonably believe them a threat.

He should have been given a medal for outstanding social work for his job of vermin control in his own house.
24

Julian.,

edinburgh 31/08/2008 21:57:46
Fernando,

You're on a wind up. Even supposing a 7 year old could walk around 8 hours in the day carrying a tennis racket he's still not going to have much of a chance against 5 ten year olds intent on beating him up.

This is a difficult one. Informing on the bullies and punishing them may provoke a further reaction but doing nothing might make it worse. A few lashes of the belt followed by expulsion of the bullies if they do it again is probably the best solution.
25

THE BPRENTICE,

01/09/2008 10:32:01
The problem will lie with the fathers of the bullies - I suspect they are missing in action!!!

The mother needs to take her son to do a martial art - it will buil self-esteem and give Dylan Carr enough 'edge' to stand up to the bullies. The only thing is, once the bullies are repelled by Dylan standing up to them, they will move on to someone else that will allow them to get away with it.

I really respect the mother for shaming the schools lack of action by going to the press AND while I'm at it ... the school should have set in place strict guidelines and education regarding bullying.

I've got a friend (he's 22 now) that was bullied at Dalkeith high and changed school to Beeslack in Penicuick - the Headmaster (he tells me) was brilliant at his new school - a zero tolerance policy meant that the kis fell in line and didn't indulge in bullying.
26

chez2211,

edinburgh 13/09/2008 09:13:34
the whole "he should learn to stand up for himself" thing is just creating another monster. the best way to deal with violence and agression is avoidance (i work with challenging behaviour, im not just talking out my ass).
people don't seem to realise the effects bullying can have on kids, all people have different personalities, i had a friend who is now dead because of bullying when she was young, she was 20 years old and the bullies made her feel SO bad she devloped a mental illness as a result, does ANY mum want to risk that happening to their child? the family of my friend are STILL utterly devastated of the loss of their daughter, NO family should ever have to go through that.

 

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