A blonde was admitted to hospital after having phone sex.

Doctors removed 2 Nokias, 3 Motorolas and a Samsung.

No Siemen was found.

Dr Lamb blames teeching methods. In all English-speeking jurisdictions, irrespectiv of teeching methods, spelling (and as a result, reeding and riting) ar belo par. When wil we realize its (sic) our caotic spelling thats (sic) the cause of it all.

It may already be beyond redemption.
We now have a generation of teachers who were never taught grammar.
In primary school, in the '50s, we could prse sentences, name clauses and punctuate.
When we arrived at secondary school, teachers of foreign languages were not obliged to teach us English grammar in order to progress our knowledge of their subject.

Ahem ... Hootsmon ... a case of pots and kettles here where you're concerned, is it not?

How many times over the last year did your posters point out YOUR mistakes?

It wasn't all typoes like we get in the comments section!

You should all be ashamed of yourselves!

.... and don't get me started on the texting generation!! A pox on all your houses!!!

Um, that would be "typo's" Boy Wonder not "typoes"....... ;-)

"Seaman gets cow pregnant" that wouldn't be David, would it?

Does that make cows the new "ships of the dessert (haha)"

#6. Dave ... typo's is the recognised American version. Note how it uses the possessive form of apostrophe "s".

Typos or typoes are equally acceptable in the English lexicon. I know. I looked it up.

Isn't it great how we can do that ... yet the Hootsmon invariably doesn't??? :)

David Eaglesham and his crew have a lot to answer for. They have given us the inarticulate commentators, the Scottish Office Minister who says "We have went...", the apostrophe hurled willy-nilly at any word ending in "s", a couple of generations of illiterates. Need I go on?

It's ridiculous that a North Briton report on the above topic should contain errors of its own.

Risible.

It's "confectionery".

#13.

Just read your post.

Rather amusing!!

Government deliberately refuses to improve education because it needs plenty of students unable to write,spell,read and count properly in order to justify mass immigration.
It's not a coincidence if the business community never complained about the dire state of our schools.
After in the years nothing changed and no mainstream party is willing to do something.
Only the British National Party will reverse this situation.

I had heard that sailors liked large women, but geez....

##boy wonder##--I am American and I have never seen "typos" spelled "typoES" here.

#6. Dave From Barra
Sorry Dave. It should read: typos. No apostrophe.

#13
Credit where credit is due-very good.

#8 Dave - ship of the dessert? Would that be shark-infested custard? ;-)

Angus

Well spotted, you fell into my carefully laid trap! Not! Good one! ;-)

Cassandra

Well it both involves a simlair ingredient - albumen!

#25 Dave,
Well, there goes the creme brulee...look what you started?!

#13 Dragonhead,
y not jst tos grmamr nda spllengi owt awl tothger, pple wld wkor it owt smoehwo!

I note that "confectionary" persists in the article above.

When I read the headline, I thought that a sailor had had sex with a cow!

Seriously, I agree that spelling and grammar nowadays is not worth the paper it is written on. Having been educated in Scotland in the 1950s, my worst subject in school was English but even I have better command of the language than most people, especially those who have university degrees.

Before I retired, I was a Staff Sergeant in a municipal police service (we can't use the word "force" any more because it only has one meaning nowadays), I was responsible for checking reports submitted by the constables. I would say that at least 95% of the reports submitted had many glaring errors in them and the worst were those written by university graduates. Their spelling, grammar and writing were terrible. Many errors (nothing to do with English) including very simple ones like checking off boxes (yes/no) for example.